Can You Wear a Corset with an Ileostomy???

Birthdays are always hard for me. It's the time of year where everything I haven't accomplished career-wise really hits home. I try to go into the day with no expectations so I don't become disappointed, but a little part of you that expects just a tiny bit of specialness is always heartbroken when nothing good comes your way.

We just got done with our SECOND move, and Mr B is extremely busy with grad school, and we don't have any money to spend, (we barely have any at all) so I understood why I would be receiving no presents this year.
Since I can't eat cake, or hardly any food at all (not typical of ileostomates, just me as I have slow transit and possible borderline Gastro Parisis), there was no cake or candle blowing. Our tiny rented rooms are empty but for lawn-chairs we borrowed from the landlady and our big suitcases. No streamers or balloons--kid things, but they can brighten up a place.

After some really uncomfortable and unsuccessful sex, I spent the rest of the night crying in the rain, waiting for buses that showed up late, walking in the really fucking cold wind to get to an overcrowded bar that didn't have room to seat me. (And at that point, I wasn't going to spend an hour traveling to the heart of the city to nightclubs.) I think I'm also so sad because when we moved, we had to leave our cats behind, with the promise from my mother that she'd make sure we'd get them back. Well, she's grown attached to them, and only wants to relinquish one now, and hasn't spoken to me since. I kept checking me inbox every day, thinking she would at least write me for my birthday, but alas...
We just feel so lost and alone and without money and directionless in this country.

BUT

Earlier that day, I went in for my second appointment to get my corset fitted. Lace Embrace is a fabulous place here in Vancouver BC where they will fit you properly and make adjustments for your own body type and desires. Because I have scoliosis, I had to wear a TLSO back-brace for about 15 years or something, at least more than ten, and I became used to the feeling of having that nice rigidness around me. However, corsets are breathable, plastic braces are not!

Lace Embrace has shops now all over the country of USA, and is run by this surprisingly young-looking Melanie. (Seriously, she looks like she's 22, and not in a surgically enhanced way at all, but in an enviably good-genetics way.)

On my first visit, her assistant fitted me and began filling out the form for the kind of corset I wanted. On my second visit, Melanie fitted me herself with Dita Von Teese's prototype stage corset. (Yeah, did  I mention Dita flies to Vancouver JUST to see Melanie and get fitted for custom corsets by her??)

Amazing. Anyway, mine is I think called the femenette, and right here on me is Dita's prototype... an overbust--I'm getting an underbust, and it's too big for me, as she is bigger than me anyway. (My shoulders look all wonky because I have on this sweater-shrug thing that goes over my T-shirt... I don't know what it's called, but it always slips off my shoulders and makes them look like footballer shoulders.)

Yes, that's Mr B waiting patiently in the background.

With Melanie, I discussed how I have an ileostomy and how I'll need access to the bag. She took down my measurements and said no problem, she can make the corset shorter, or have a little flap that opens and buttons up again, just like the Victorian nursing-corsets, with flaps to open for boobage to come out.

I have this problem with ligaments in my body, and those holding up my organs are wear and so my liver etc has all fallen very low. With a corset, it lifts them back up where they should be. And no, it's not bad for your digestion, and no, I'm not a tight-lacer. I don't want to have to defend my reasons for liking corsets. Some feminists will say it's cages of men's tyranny or whatever bla bla. Others will say Why--you're skinny enough. It's not about being skinny, it's about being an hourglass, and I love old fashions anyway, so STFU.

I'm getting mine made in this pale pinkish sort of cotton twill--I think it's called??--that has this sort of jaquard-ish floral design. It's going to be edged in cream lace, and though we still have to knock out a few details about stitching, for the most part, I think that's it. In 4-6 weeks I return to Lace Embrace for a specific fitting of my actual corset--and I will keep you posted!!

More Bag-Hiding Fashion for the Femininely Inclined

So maybe my skirts aren't really your style. They weren't mine before, but I've come to really like them. But there are times when I'm pretty fucking sick of them, so here's another option. I used to dress more like, let's see, this:  

This is some sushi and fried cream-cheese wontons I made for my boyfriend/now-husband Mr B back when I could actually eat the things I made. I favoured sleeker clothing because I'm young and people have a limited amount of years they can wear crap like this before their body decides it's going to take a nap. 

I don't always wanna wear a cupcake skirt. I don't really appreciate giving across the impression that I think I'm just such a cute little girl ooo look at me. I guess with my surly attitude, nobody really gets that impression from me, but I'm afraid sometimes that they might, or maybe I'm just paranoid about it. 

So are you sick of not being able to wear your old clothing? Me too. Fuck everything--I'm wearing what I want and I'm modifying it to suit my baggery needs.

The spatters on the mirror are, per usual, entirely my fault. I lean really close to the mirror to do my flossing and this is the result. I should have cleaned it before I took photos, but I'm running out of battery and had to snap them really fast.

I took a stretchy-silky material T-shirt and cut it under the bust to use as my "skirt". Of course that was too large around my hips and bum, so I gathered all the excess material to one side and pinned it down. It creates gathers which are a great illusion to hide your bag. (Since this is pictured in the mirror, my bag is on the opposite side of the pin.)

Here I didn't want to be all gross, but I wanted to show you that you still look normal sitting down, too. That it's not all hugely bumpy and obvious, thanks to the clever little gathers.

Pregnancy and your Ileostomy

I've been wondering about that for a while, since even before I got my first loop Ileo.

I'm what many would quantify as underweight, but for me, this has always been where I'm at, give or take 10 lbs. With my mixed Chinese ancestry, my body is unfortunately small. I'm not a stack of ribs like before my surgery, but I'm smaller than I'd want to be. Still, for all that, I've always had a terribly regular menstrual cycle. YOU WANTED TO KNOW, DIDN'T YOU?
Although 10% of ileostomates have fertility troubles (mostly due to blocked fallopian tubes via adhesions) I don't think that will ever be my main concern. My family... we are fertile people. We don't have five-thousand children, we have about 2 or 3 per household, but generally, first try always resulted in what my husband annoying refers to as "crotch fruit". (For the uninitiated, "crotch fruit"= children. I don't know from where he got that phrase, and frankly, I don't want to know.) And some women end up having fertility problems because of gynecological issues after surgery.

A very small percentage of men have sexual dysfunction problems after ileostomy, j-pouch or colostomy surgery.  Sometimes they can get it up but can't get it off, and sometimes they just remain flaccid. This isn't trouble from the "Ileostomy", but from is they are removing the colon as well and do some hasty slices to those innocent little nerve endings around the rectum. Obviously, if your surgeon has done your type surgery over 100 times successfully, with very little to no complications, your chances of recovering without any trouble are a lot greater.  

So here are my general worries/ apprehensions regarding pregnancy for us female Ileostomates:
*Sometimes, with the enlarging utererus, intestinal obstructions are unavoidable, and sometimes even last for months long at a time and women are put on TPN to just to let them live.
*With the internal pressure of the growing human parasite, the stoma enlarges and sometimes prolapses. Although, "Women who have had an ileostomy also can have a prolapse or obstruction of the ileostomy during pregnancy. Waiting a year after the (initial) surgery before becoming pregnant reduces that likelihood." ( Source)
*peristomal hernia!
*need for second surgery to relocate ostomy!
*All these and more listed here!!!

& here are:
*Some facts from Inside Out On-line May/June 2000
*Someone who's had a pretty good result
*Some mixed results
*More brief mixed
*Some don't seem to have much trouble at all, either conceiving or carrying
*Blockages, being on liquid diets
*Here's a terrifying page (the whole 3-page reading is worth it though) of women dying from obstructions that doctors don't understand or dismiss due to them being pregnant, and other delightful complications that mostly seem obstructionary related.

Although  Google searches will show you a great deal more, I have yet to come across personal stories, as in day by day descriptions of life with an ileostomy and pregnancy as in Blog form. On my blog roll, I have someone who was just starting a pregnancy with an ileo, but sadly she lost her baby and doesn't know when/if she'll conceive again.

And yet, at the end of the gestation period, how the hell is this creature going to be expelled??


GOOD LORD

 Caesarean-sections are generally discouraged as a form of birthing for Ileostomates, what with scar tissue and the actual ileostomy itself, many doctors are wary of creating ever more the complications and ever more scar tissue.
Shitty news for me.
Because of my internal scars and due to my body size, I WILL need caesarean. My mother, who is a significant amount larger than me (not in fat quantity, just larger bones) needed C-sections as well. We tend to have non-widening hips in our family, even with the rush of pregnancy hormones. Natural selection is trying to kill us out. Fuck you Darwin.



I also am really interested to see in what ways a woman's body returns to normal after pregnancy with an ileostomy. What happens with the stoma? And what happens with your stomach? Do the loose folds and shit make it hard to get an external appliance that fits properly?

Of course, according to logic, this isn't something I should be considering even THINKING about right now. We have no money, my career hasn't shot off anywhere, Mr B still needs to finish Grad School, my health sucks, and it's not that I have a hungry uterus that squees in joy each time I see someone elses baby, either. This is just an honest wondering of mine, a daydream if you will, that might or might not ever come to (crotch-fruit) fruition.
And then I have to ask myself all the questions women ask themselves anyway, outside of being an ileostomate:
Am I too selfish to have children?
 I value my alone time. Whereas my heart used to ache with loneliness, I have grown accustomed to and now enjoy my solitude, as that is when I can work the best. These mornings before Mr B wakes up are my easiest time to work. As soon as he wakes, I am busy preparing food for him, and as we live in a one-room abode at the moment, I'm more inhibited and don't work as well. (It's most def not a misogynist relationship either. I honestly LIKE to get things ready for him, to cook for him and do little things like that, because I feel like I'm contributing and helping in the areas where I can help and he does the other things that I can't do. Like pieces of a puzzle that fit together, or steps of a stairway.)

My husband is a very gentle patient man. He is soft-spoken and kind. I get frustrated, I'm impatient, I'm flustered under stress. Babies are stress. Make no mistake, they look cute (occasionally, after the vernix caseosa is wiped off and they're not crying) but I already have trouble sleeping, so I'm not really gonna dig being woken up to feed. (Although I guess I was a silent baby, according to my mom, and never woke her during the night. I don't believe that is the norm, however.)
Even under ideal circumstances, with perfect health, babies will stress you the fuck out. Even more so when you are dealing with a fucked-up stoma that may or may not be bulging with hernias in need of surgical repair and possible relocation after expulsion of the miniature human.

So I have to honestly ask myself, what are my reasons for wanting a child? Because I think I will be a good parent? Who honestly can say that? Every mother I know wishes they had done things differently, as is the human condition of someone with a conscience, I suppose.
A child isn't an extension of myself. It's this small being with its own ideas and comments and likes and needs and wants, and I wont understand them. And they wont understand me. And to them, I will just be a provider and someone that loves and wants to protect them. But they will become a mouthy teen, they will want to drink and smoke and do things of this nature, and they will becomes confused young adults on their own time.
Do I think that I have enough wisdom to pass on to another human being? Do I want a child just because of biological urges, because I think of it as an expression of our love?
I don't really have genes I'd want to propagate. I'm not the best looking, not the smartest. My husband is damn sexy, but the rest of his family is questionable, at best.
We could always adopt, I think about that also quite a bit as our best friend was adopted from Korea and we love him like crazy.
These questions still hold true for adoption though, maybe more so as more thought and money is put into this, and then there's the possibility that the birth-mother of the adopted child consumed drugs or alcohol during her pregnancy, or has a family lineage of mentally or physically disfiguring diseases. Sigh.

At least if it was my own pregnancy, I'd know no chemicals entered into the gestation equation. Nutrition is a concern for me, however. Most of my nutrients come from Ensure and vitamins and tons of supplements... and as there are plenty of stories of women with Ileos that are put on TPN for their last months of pregnancy for whatever reason.

I always swore I'd be a better Buddhist by the time we were ready for children. I do not want them growing up without a temple nearby, and monks to help guide them through their development, so they do not become like everyone else, like myself as well, stuck with my mind in this plane of existence, always anxious and fraught with indecision. If they can grow with their minds at peace, none of the ordinary trip-ups of humanity will harm them. It would be... possibly the greatest achievement to raise children that were wise and unconcerned with the physical world. 

So for now, this is just a consideration in the back of my mind, because who knows? Things change. Life changes. This time three years ago, if you told me I would be married and move out of the country, I would have slapped you with rage-tears in my eyes for your filthy teasing lies. I would never have imagined that I could move out of the basement, much less leave the house. My body was a cage.

back then, literally all day and night was agony, torture-- there was no life for me to have. There was nothing to distract me from my body trying to kill itself, nor from me wanting to kill myself... because there was no way out. Every doctor told me either I was crazy, I was overreacting, I was the one creating the problems, that no one actual did a surgery for my problems, that such things didn't exist, ect. I was so hopeless and felt so helpless and lost and like there was no direction.
Shit, getting an ileostomy didn't give me the life of a god, I still have problems, of course I do--but who the fuck cares compared to that tiger pit of despair I was mired in for the majority of my life. Living the way I had  limited my choices for the future until there was nothing left but every day, every minute just trying to hold on for another hour because it would have crushed my mother's heart if I had let go.

And really, isn't that what you fear the most, if you choose to have a child, if you choose to be a parent? That your child will be in pain? That one day, you too will have to watch them suffer and hurt and cry in pain, and be helpless to stop the illness that terrorizes them?

Black output from ileo bag

Red Wine.
I hate it, but my sister loves it. Now that I live near her, she insists I see her occasionally, and she also insists on giving me red wine for the occasion. Let me just preference this by saying red wine is disgusting as shit. I have drunken 151 and other shit that will set your hair on fire if you are near a microwave because it simply gets the job done. Red wine is just a waste of stomach space and doesn't do shit other than make your ileostomy output black.
I have discovered this after two closely monitored red-wine drinking attempts.
As bile is green, and red wine is, you guessed it, red, the combination colour is black.
Colour wheel as visual:

Red across from green. Black, motherfuckers.

Or, if that isn't gross enough for you, and of course it isn't, here's something you can relate to:

I pulled my bag-holder aside to show the blackness. Fucking gross, yeah, but this is what it looks like and don't be alarmed that you're dying.

Rectal Stump Suctioning & Stomal Stenosis

A month ago maybe, I had my rectal stump suctioned out at my Swedish surgeon's office. He's the incredibly intelligent dude who talks to you like you are a human being, but he doesn't hold your hand and certainly doesn't fuck around.
So some peeps who have a total colectomy, every 2 weeks or something they'll have rectal drainage. It's just a smidge of clear jelly, as your intestine is still creating and shedding its lining and all that. Well, mine doesn't feel like following orders and so I went to his office for suction time.
Friends, neighbors... back when I was a teenager before my large intestine resection, I had to bend over ass naked on this table and a Dr stuck a looooong scissors up my asshole and took a SNIPPET of the inside tissue to test for something whatever. I WAS STILL AWAKE. I was given NO DRUGS. I was given NO WARNING. I began to have Vasovagel reaction from the pain, high-pitched noise in my ears drowning-out all sounds, my vision clouded and white, my body's blood pressure plummeting alarmingly. Yeah. So that was pretty fucked up, but this suction thing wasn't as bad as that but still by no means do I recommend it.
It's heavy on the ass-rape, and as I've never been one to travel the road of the difficult brown, I didn't kin much to my Swedish surgeon finding out just how much pain I could tollerate before I broke down completely. It was like a Saw movie.
So they lie you on your side with a sheet covering just the unclothed bottom half, then jam a tube up your no-no, then flush some liquid junk into it and suction it back out. I was shaking the whole time from pain and doing this thing I do when I'm really really hurting, where I kind of growl through my teeth. I've never been a screamer. I've never gotten scared and screamed, not even on rollercoasters. On rollercoasters, I get really sarcastic and start saying shit like "Oh boy. Here comes the big drop. Oh good. Okay. Great. Looks fun." I've even had people tell me to shut the fuck up, and rightfully so. But I don't scream. I got my foot run over by a car once. I just kind of looked down and said really quietly "oh." Like I'd stepped in dog shit. No... I think if I'd have stepped in dog shit, I might have had more of a reaction than that. But anyway, I don't scream, and though I get many tears in my eyes, I don't cry. It's shit for the vocal chords, and it's annoying as fuck to scream. I heard kids screaming all the time in my old neighborhood--you try and tell me with a straight face the sound of high-pitched little kids screams at 7 am on a Saturday morning is ever EVER on your top list of cherished noises to burn on that CD of Songs to Listen to for Peaceful Living.
I can't even lie, I dreamily contemplated murder.

Oh yeah--and while I'm mentioning fun facts I forgot to mention earlier, back when I still had my le loop stoma, my uncaring bitch of a first surgeon (Dr Asshole) checked for stenosis (narrowing of the small intestine due to strictures/scar tissue) by shoving his bloated finger down into my goddamned stoma opening. I now know what it feel like to be raped in the stomach. And once inside, the fucker kind of wiggled it around too, you know, just for fun. It was a strange sensation, to say the least. Not necessarily painful, as in it didn't totally hurt, but it's an uncomfortable feeling to say the least, to have someone dig around inside your guts while you're un-anaesthetised and quite aware and watching.

Misgivings and Fears prior to Ileostomy Surgery, & what to look out for on your own

So you're scared about having an ileostomy surgury, but you've reached this desperate point in your life where you're actually researching it, and stumbled across this blog.

 There comes a time when you have to weigh the convenience and the quality of life against your fears. Too many times, asshole USA surgeons I ran into didn't even know the phrase "quality of life". They would scowl at me like I was speaking some alien language. They didn't deal with that. Over and over I was told "I operate for emergenceis." If SO--then they should work in the ER. Fuckers. Quality of life is when a doctor can actually restore you to a "better" sense of life with less pain than you are now in. And isn't that the vow of ALL doctors? Do no harm? Help the patient? It isn't a delusional addicted mind asking for more pain pills... no one begs to have an ileotomy done except me. Yeah. Not like I loved the idea--but I had come to a point in my life where having a shit-spout in my gut was a fuck of a lot more preferrable to the other option, which would have been DEATH. Too many bitches passed me off like I was frontin' and just trying to get an ileostomy for fun?? WTF. Yeah--my dream in life is to spin in circles and shit at the same time like a garden sprinkler.

I'm a Buddhist, but dear fucking gods, I cannot stand assholes like this who get a bit of an education and take a shit all over their patient, as if they were god and they can play marbles with the outcome of your life and fuck you if you don't like it because their degree is bigger than yours.
Listen. My late father was a surgeon. I know VERY WELL their attitudes. Maybe only once in my life have I ever met/spoken to/interacted with a sugeon who was willing to really listen, and really just be a normal humble kind person with me. It usually takes a certain attitude to get into the job, one of gradiose, one of god-complex, a bit of narsessism, and a whole lot of secret shame and emotional injury to drive them to think abusing poor suffering souls is a good and just idea. Wankers. I hope they're tortured in all 9 levels of Dante's hell.
I say "usually" because I know there are always exceptions.
A lot of surgeons don't like to operate on Crohnes patients for ileostomies because it's not like it cures the disease, but this is what I was talking about with "quality of life". Giving a weelchair to a crippled guy isn't going ot make him walk again, but he can be mobile on his own, and give him back a sece of being independant again. To doctors that don't understand this, I hope you or someone your black heart loves suffers through the same situation as you force your patients through.

Anywaaaayyyyy.........

Here are some questions I'll address.
Others have had diarrhea/diarrhoea where the digestive enzymes burn on exit. They're afraid of getting the stoma in case it burns just as much.
 The stoma IS and ISN'T like an anus. It acts in much the same way, but things exiting will not hurt--unless you have some kind of blockage, but that's another matter for another time, and earlier posts. The only time digestive juices hurt is when it repeatedly touches around the OUTSIDE of the stoma, which casues skin erosion and skin breakdown similar to a sore all around the outside. 
You see, the stoma itself has no nerve-endings, (PDF from American Cancer Society) as it is just the small intestine turned inside-out. It may even bleed, and you don't really have any idea unless you be all up in its face, checking it out all the time and poking at it with your comact mirror. The majority of ileostomates--myself not totally discluded from this list--will have watery output. If you have something seriously going wrong with you and it's waaay fucking watery--you will know. There will be other signs of something going off inside your body, Trust. But again, normal is liquidy, depending on diet and fluid intake. And no, it doesn't burn, it doesn't sting, it's not like having diarrhea. It's just a bother to find another toilet to dump your bag into, but so what?

QUELLING SOME CONERCERNS
Depending on how big your body is to begin with, and how much you normally put in your stomach, the nighttime bag-drainage is not a problem. Sometimes during the night, the majority of us, young and old, get up to take a wizz. After doing so, give your bag a little jiggle to see if it's full. I do this during the day anyway. I cup my bag like rappers cup their junk--and feel it to see the weight and heft--and if shit's heavy, I dump it out. No big deal.

Does insurence cover ostomy supplies? Do bears shit in the woods? Mostly. It's a damn fucking shady insurence to not cover, uhm MEDICAL SUPPLIES needed for you to uhm STAY THE FUCK ALIVE. It depends on your own individual insurence of course, and right now I'm going through my own hassels trying to get insurence set-up in a new country, but medical supplies are usually covered. In some way or another. It's worth your life to fight them on it too. Get doctors to sign shit you type up outlining why you need bags and supplies, if it coems down to it. This is a no-brainer. I got both my GP to and surgeon to sign a paper I printed out saying how many osotmy bags I needed each month, my strip-pate needs, my liquid adhesive, ostomy powder and Melgasorb needs each month. DUDE, don't be shy. They are doctors. They are human beings that aint god and they are there as a public servant that you are MORE THAN LIKELY paying for. Fuck asking them. DEMAND that they fucking sign it. This is your life.

And lastly, when you have your little stoma, of course you are going to be worried about it. Especially in the first few weeks. It's like taking a newborn infant home from the hospital. Every little thing makes you question whether it is safe or if what you are doing is good enough. Even though I'll wager I've written something similar to this before, here it is again.

Here's WHEN YOU SHOULD CALL YO DOCTOR or OSTOMY NURSE:

• If you have stomach cramps lasting more than 2 or 3 hours (and it's not period/menstrual related)
• Nausea and vomiting for more than a day
• No ileostomy output for 4-6 hours combined with cramping and nausea
• Pretty fucking watery output continuously for more than 5 or 6 hours
• Bad odor lasting more than a week (This may be a sign of infection.)
• A deep cut or injury to the stoma (This is when I went to the ostomy nurse, when the ostomy wasn't sewn down right)
• Bad skin irritation or deep ulcers (sores--dude man, same as above in my case)
• Fuck tons of blood from the stoma opening
• Continuous bleeding where the stoma meets the skin (SAME FOR ME PART 2, Y'ALL)
• Unusual change in your stoma size and color (Usually hand-in-hand with blockage)
• Anything unusual going on with your ostomy (It makes hotel reservations for Florida while you're sleeping, doesn't complete homework after school and hangs out with the "wrong" types of kids)

So how about it, kids? Any more questions/concerns? Either leave a comment, or sent me a mail if you're a little to shy to publicly ask. When I gather enough Q's together, I'll do another question-answering post.

Care for a Flush or Retracted Stoma

Forgive me here, as I don't know much personally about it, so this page will be riddled with references and links. I know this affects plenty, so here we go.

A "flush" stoma sits skin-level or even retracts. Not only is it super hard to take care of and/or fit for appliances, but the leakage around it from improper fitting and frequent pouch changes can end up being frustrating, painful and expensive.


Prolapsed ostomy= red elephant trunk

 I don't necessarily LOVE having an ostomy that is roughly two inches long, but like a flaccid dick, it just kind of hangs down in a little curve like a sad rainbow and isn't that noticeable. In any case, it is much easier to pour from an actual spout than it would be to pour from a hole carved into your gut. Much easier to clean, too. (At least it's not prolapsed, like this horror-story here--->)






If you have a flush or retracted stoma, it's hard to maintain a proper seal. That's where convex products come in.

If you are looking through an ostomy catalogue, you'll come across shallow, medium and deep convex stuff, depending on if your stoma is situated in folds, you have leakage, or the damn thing's super retracted into your body like a red belly-button.

The list of products available are pretty straight-forward on same as above link, but if you're too lazy and hate pop-up windows, here's the copy-paste:

Convex inserts:  Inserts can be applied to a two-piece system by snapping an insert into the ring of the flange. The outer diameter must match the flange size. This can be cost effective as this insert can be cleaned and reused.

Pouches Designed with Convexity:  These are available in both one and two-piece systems. They can be shallow, medium, or deep. They come as either precut, cut or cut to fit.

Addition of Skin Barrier Gaskets:  These are used around the stoma and can be cut or purchased precut. One layer or several layers can be used.

Eakins Wafer / Colorplast Strip Paste:  These are products that can be pressed into shape around the stoma to protect the seal. 

Use Ostomy paste for “caulking.” Always read and follow manufacturer’s direction for product use.

Product Information:

Most ostomy companies make pouches with convexity and carry inserts as well as belts. 
ConvaTec uses a product called “Durahesive,” which has a turtleneck effect around the stoma.
Hollister has the “Premier” series that does not erode.
Nu-Hope makes barriers that are oval as well as round and which have deep convexity. Nu-Hope also makes support belts and Hernia belts for urostomies.

Here's some tips on how to treat de-nuded (ie rubbed the fuck raw) skin around flush stomas, but the info here I've seen proves pretty useful for any ostomate experiencing a rash or that raw open-sore like place around your stoma. I use 3 M No-Sting Barrier Film every day. Shit's awesome.